BIGGER FISH TO FRY

 

these ads always seemed so silly.....but i knew kids who'd send in their nickels and dimes in hopes of momentary pleasures.......while i saved up the $29 for the taj mahal building block set at the back of Connoisseur Magazine.....but then, I had nothing to impress the other 3rd graders with on the playground.......but, under the bed, a palace was rising to the bed slats........

HOUSE OF CARDS

 

 

simple or complex, we all make them, by an accumulation of large and small decisions......the more tenuous the decision, the more fragile the constructs........just a flick of the finger, and it topples........the higher the dreams, the harder they fall........

how i feel today

 

the pencil tells it like it is.....
art as truth?
looks that way to me....
sigh!
I feel defeated and overwhelmed today......
having listened to NPR news....
and interacted, poorly, with the world outside..
I am best served by art and music.....
it's four past noon, sunny, 85 degrees.......
well, that's a start.......

CHOOSE A PATH TO AN OBJECTIVE

 

since the "best way" is the most efficient, most productive and satisfying way, why do we stumble around these paths of self-deception, taking sideroads that go nowhere and backroads through Life's brambles and thorns, snakepits and dead ends? I think that it is because we are led by our egos that, in their eternal need to be "right" will stubbornly course over hot coals, fall through the tissues of lies, flailing and screaming inside, while trying to appear in control, so that others are tricked by these deceptions into following the same paths........monkey see...monkey do.....pretty stupid, I think.......our calculations are thwarted by circumspective avoidance of the consciousness of motivation and purpose.....carried by the plights of the will on the backs of runaway emotions, to destinations short of our hopes and dreams........

THE SYMBIOSE

i can remember my obsessiveness with mind constructs and even with types of "things".....

bed sheets, austrian pottery, gold-tooled leather boxes, comic books, early victorian and

georgian brooches.....tibetan bronzes....the list goes on! 

one particular obsession, for a while, was watches.....many inhabit the depths of cold lock boxes....

i occasionally lug them out for viewing and wonder where my mind was when i bought them........this one, however, is still a "keeper"......the rectangular part and the round part are an optical illusion.....

the two parts have exactly the same outside measurement, although the rectangular area appears

to have the greater measure......so, for $8500 i was permitted to wear it in amazement!

so what....i just witnessed a fellow paying $85 for a Jack Fruit at Whole Foods........

THE NIGHTMARE

coming from what would have been my grandparents'
bedroom......i fled down a long hallway of my dream's device.....crossed a floor furnace.....and entered the
living room, closing the door behind me and moving the old lock's painted "switch" to the closed position....then a bullet went through the door and i
heard a thrashing sound from the other side......fleeing, i crossed the room, exited the front door, ran to the front gate, and ran as quickly as i could, down the sidewalk, past my uncle and aunt charlie and nell's house, past the copeland house, past the sharp house, past uncle edward and aunt mary's house.....an enamelled door appeared, through which i raced, my heart beating wildly...to emerge, alert and anxious in my bed.....my legs were as exhausted....as though i had actually used them....my bedroom was glowing.....it was not my bedroom....it was the guest bedroom of my aunt glenn's.....full of scary, stuffed birds and small mammels with glass eyes....i lept, in terror, from the tall bed and fell for what seemed an eternity, to the floor, which kept receding.......i turned, and reached for something to stop my fall....
finally i came to rest in my bed, where i am now.....another rabbit hole! so, it's not even four in the morning, i am wide awake, my body aching, apprehensive, anxious........i must return, to find out who is on the other side of the door......i know his
name is jack!


Human by Falling You




Human by Falling You

TASTEFUL

so we post "tasteful" photos of ourselves..to avoid censure, dismissal or outright condemnation......well, this IS modest, no?

get it while you can

when we're very young, we run around naked, and have lots of fun......later, we are taught "modesty" and "shame".......and, like adam and eve, we must at least wear a thong.....how about just having a good time.....and keep having a good time......sounds good to me........of course, NOW, i am an old fart and don't run around naked........but, if i looked like....well....ANY of these guys! My maternal grandparents were so blaise about it....i once saw my grandmother drying, after a bath, with her legs split over a floor furnace......she had a large wart on her left inner thigh......and once, i was hiking with my grandfather and some other young guys that i schooled with.....grandpa dropped trousers to take a dump...right there, in the open field, and returned to continue his monologue about underground cisterns....then we went to an underground cistern in which the water was always cool and brisk...even on a july day like that one......all of us boys were too embarassed to strip down and dive in....except grandpa......we are the only animal that i know of that spends trillions of bucks--actually, that goes to any bother, whatsoever, to cover ourselves up.........and have laws to keep it that way!

CHESTER

 

 

they all look the same?

ants can identify individuals within a colony.........
birds can identify their neighbors by their songs, sometimes..by a single note.....
dogs can smell your coming and sense your mood before you do......
my cat has an immense, communicative vocabulary
and is always reminding me of her unique requirements......
the man who sees individuals avoids conflict........
everyone wants to be recognized as unique....

TOILET FEATHERS

THESE VIVACIOUS BIRDS ARE ALWAYS HOLDING COURT
IN THE BATHROOM AT THE CABIN....I'VE GROWN VERY
FOND OF THEIR CHEERFUL COMPANY.........

t.r. knight + mark cornelsen

i have never quite comprehended the hatred
that has been produced by the religious majority.
here are two obviously gay individuals who are intelligent,
talented, kind and in love.......there is no God to hate them...
only wicked, twisted humans......poor Jesus, he would have wept.....

AN OLD VEDIC LEGEND.........

There was not death,
--yet was there nought
immortal.
There was no confine betwixt
day and night.
The only One breathed
breathless by itself;--
Other than it,
there nothing since has been.
Darkness there was,
and all at first was veiled
In gloom profound,
--an ocean without light.
The germ that still lay
covered in the husk
Burst forth, one nature,
from the fervent heat.

BUDHISM

i was, for a while, in my twenties, intrigued by the writings of A.P. Sinnett and Blavatsky's SECRET DOCTRINE....
but as i saw others slavishly devoted to ritual and dogma, my interest slipped away....but not before i assimilated what knowledge of the constructs of universal wisdom that i deemed pertinant to my "spiritual" happiness........at this point, i suppose i'm an atheist buddist, although i practice no rituals or devotions whatsoever....i still meditate on Nothingness to clear my RAM........Ohmmmmm..........

KEEPING THE DEVILS IN THE HOLD

ACCOUTREMENTS

I have always preferred luxuries to necessities........a beautiful golden vial to a step-open trash can......silk flannel sheets to outdoor grill covers......so many live spartan lives.....the most luxurious parts of their lives are their weddings and funeral.....carpe diem!

 

as granite thrusts from magma. and cooled,
is covered by moss and ferns,
does Prada cover moley, flaking skin, to pose as Nature's Truth...
those trapped by Age, in shame and guilt,
are quick to judge the flesh of Youth...

age, the decomposition of perfection,
wrapped in irony and contradiction,
leads us, falling forward, back to Earth,
to horizons, yet unperceived in its turnings,
and ventures, in constant manifestation,
till evanescence tosses mortal coil
and reunites form with pure energy..
returning to the brightest light, unseen....
stripped of mortal shelter...