REFLECTIONS FROM THE INNER MEMORY BANKS, AFTER VIEWING "JACKIE".........

Viewing Natalie Portman's very Darren Aronofsky-inspired portrait of Jacqueline Kennedy.....as 'Jackie' Kennedy......in Pablo Larraín's Film, JACKIE.......many emotions that I felt, still an 18-year old......even remembering where I was seated during Dr. Alexander Marchant's very philosophical history lecture that was attended by my entire freshman class.....800....and, within months, to be honed to 300 by attrition, by inattention, immaturity and sybaritic social immersion.......As our lecturer was predicting, based on his familiarity with the perpetual tides of aspirative mediocrity......Two days later, the school was left for disinfecting as it's cast of 'we know it all, already' students, by habituation and under cultural and social pressures, both real and perceptual, left for their various holidays of feasting and gift-giving.....seemingly, oblivious to what had happened in Texas, just a few days before.......Watching "JACKIE" jolted my aging memory banks that still seem to be packed with details....both visual and emotional......that were now recombinant chemical restructuring, unconscious constructs....pulling my mind and behavior, conceptualizations and unprocessed Art......as my mind's painting and re-painting the details of memory, that it remain...for reconsideration....for further-processing......even to introduce cautionary avoidance sub-routines like avoiding traveling in a downtown 'street parade'.....looking into the upper windows of Macy's and The Polaris Room for the glint of sunlight on a steel barrel.......Dr. Marchant wept, with a countenance of hopelessness, as he broke from his 'lecture' to tell the mostly oblivious 'freshmen' of the tragic event..........Why do I remember what I was wearing that day, and where and by whom I sat? I have forgotten, already, entire months of my Life, that my brain has re-stitched and edited-for-content; and, I've forgotten, already, what I was wearing 72 hours ago........